I dreamt I killed a serial murderer by sticking her in the side with the pin of my brooch.

Rae and I slowdanced to The Rolling Stones and kissed as I held a spatula in my hand. I was in the middle of making pancakes. I burnt the first one — it was the first time I’d ever burnt a pancake — but it still tasted good.

In the early evening I drifted off to sleep while Michael prayed in whisper voice the rosary. After waking, I prayed mine for him and he fell into a nap.

Dream : a popstar in a long skirt with a panel from the Peanuts sewn into it reclined in a strange leather chair. We spoke about our shared love of Woodstock in her dingy apartment. I peered out the kitchen window : we must have been at least 8 stories up. Below, sidewalks, a park, tall buildings, and frozen glossy puddles all over.

Numberless dumb questions and deep laughter.

Dreamt of staying in a lighthouse on a snowy shore. I led a pack of malamutes in flight, like an Alaskan Rudolph.

Snowflakes on a sunny day. Pig intestines and weak tea. Tried to follow the beads of my rosary while my Pigeon friend prayed his. I got lost three times, but it still worked. Naomi had given me my rosary a few years ago. We don't really talk anymore. As I listened to my Pigeon friend's prayers I realized I had been avoiding using my rosary because I held some resentment toward Naomi for becoming a lot more distant from me after she got a boyfriend, and because I felt ashamed about how foolishly conformist I had been during our friendship. But during prayer I didn't feel resentment or pain. I felt thankful for everything and a measure of acceptance.

In my dream I was teaching kindergarten. They had just done an art project and I could only choose a few to show to the class. Three kids were shouting because they wanted their piece exhibited. They wanted attention and I could see myself as a child in them. I felt love.


Tears of happiness, over and over. Being held. "My sensitive Ivy."